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Tag Archives: Preaching

Preaching on Sin (Humor)


The preacher planned to preach on sin and thought it best to bring all of his belongings with him just in case…

 
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Posted by on May 13, 2012 in Uncategorized

 

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Is There an App for That? (Humor)


 

“Whereas our primogenitors fought against the fortifications and antimachinations of antidisestablishmentarianism, we shall strive continually, ceaselessly, and monotonously with pugnaciousness, fervor, and alacrity for the freedom to worship with forthrightness, rectitude, and perspicuity…”

 

This is what happens when you give a young preacher an iphone with a vocabulary builder app…

 
 
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Posted by on September 2, 2011 in Uncategorized

 

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Proof There are No Southern Baptists in Heaven (Humor)


” As your pastor, I must report that I fear there may not be any Southern Baptists in Heaven. In Rev 7, John sees a multitude standing before the Lamb that no one could count; therefore, since Southern Baptists can and will count anything that moves and record it as attendance, I have to submit that there may not be any Southern Baptists in Heaven…”

 
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Posted by on April 30, 2011 in Uncategorized

 

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Semper Fi (Humor)


(Shouting) “EPHESIANS 6:10 SAYS TO BE STRONG IN THE LORD AND IN THE POWER OF HIS MIGHT, PEOPLE. STOP YUR PANSYING AROUND AND GET OUT THERE AND GET TO WORK, YOU BUNCH OF BALLERINAS…”  

When the elders suggested young pastor Fred simplify his messages, he misunderstood them to have said to Semper Fi his messages…  

 
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Posted by on March 24, 2011 in Uncategorized

 

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A West Minister’s Confession (Satire)


“We warned you ’bout all that verse-by-verse expositional preachin’, pilgrim. Now this is yer last warnin’. Get relevant or get hanged. Afterall, it’s 1827 for cryin’ out loud… We’ll never be able to git 50 people attendin’ preachin’ unless we broaden our appeal. Now what’ll it be?”

 
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Posted by on October 26, 2010 in Uncategorized

 

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Are Emergents Actually Christian?


Someone needs to ask this question so I suppose the Truthinator will be the one who does. Are adherents to the Emergent Church concept actually Christian? Hold the phone, Emergents, because I know you guys are ready to pounce with the oh so predictable, “Don’t judge lest ye be judged” gem. 

Here is why I ask this question. The hallmark of the Emergent situation is people do not like, appreciate, or connect to traditional Christianity. These people want hip music, stylistic interpretation rather than expository preaching, calming monologues in a performance vein rather than pulpit-pounding, erudite ego stroking rather than the conviction that comes from learning what the word of God says and etc.

Don’t deny it because you know it is true. Where is the proof? Look in the mirror. Ask yourself if this is true. You know that it is. Read the books and blogs from the Emergent gurus. Emergents want a more user friendly and inclusive community gathering instead of fellowship in Christ’s suffering. 

The reason I ask whether Emergents are really Christian is that most if not all of the driving force factors that build the Emergent movement are contrary to what the Bible says that God is and what He demands.  Keep reading.

Here are just a few but enough to cause serious consideration of my thesis.      1) Jesus – Sometimes he is heralded by Emergents but never as the Christ of the Bible. He is “JC”, “Rad Dude Jesus”, “Breakdancing Jesus”, or several others of a variety of fictitious manifestations. Even the Emergents who actually talk Jesus give Him attributes He doesn’t actually maintain and take away unpalatable ones (in their eyes) that are true.

 2) All inclusiveness – Everyone goes to Heaven regardless of what they believe or there is not even a Heaven at all and everyone dies and are gone from existence. Both of these ideas are common in Emergent “thinking” but neither are true because neither are found in the Bible.

3) This is the final point I will mention here but there are others. The Bible is not believed by ANY of the Emergents (do some research and you will find drift or even exodus from core Bible truth). Emergents replace, twist, spin, delete, and insert Bible teachings. All of which are prohibited by the Bible. I am not talking about disagreeing on gray areas such as exactly when the rapture of the Church will occur. I am speaking of items such as atonement, Christology, Soteriology, creation, Heaven, Hell, the reality of God, and so forth.

When people do not believe such foundational truths, they cannot be classified as belonging to that group who do believe. This is very simple. Let me give a quick example then I am out of here. Let’s say my neighbor claims to be an avid tennis player. I see him dressed in tennis clothes and carrying a racquet many times per week. Once at the courts, however, he doesn’t play tennis but plays cards with friends instead. Looking the part does not define the person.

The Bible defines several things about those who are called of God into eternal salvation.  A few of these include  falling upon Jesus as their only hope, changing to become new creatures (over time) in their inner beliefs and outward behavior, and producing lifestyle outcomes that resemble what the Bible teaches about the character and nature of God Himself.

Are Emergents actually Christian? Some may be but I am doubtful that many if any true Christians could stay in an environment that does not believe God’s word or truly worship Him. While it is above everyone’s paygrade to determine the validity of a person’s claim of belonging, the Bible is very clear that not all who make this claim actually belong. I encourage you to read up on what the Emergents believe. It will take some time but this is of vital importance. This movement is sweeping the country and many Emergents are influencing our young people daily. Counter error with truth; it is the only way.

 
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Posted by on June 2, 2010 in Uncategorized

 

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