Not Rocket Science (Satire)

09 Sep



Posted by on September 9, 2014 in Uncategorized


2 responses to “Not Rocket Science (Satire)

  1. Ann

    September 10, 2014 at 8:34 am

    It has been my experience in a seeker friendly church, that one must tolerate the worship band’s presence with no criticism nor condemnation otherwise you are “rebelling” against authority. You must sing with a smile all the while your head aches from the banging drums and the screechy guitars, and you dare not show your pain. You must, must, must raise your hands as a sign of public adoration as one in music leadership quoted, “I can tell those who are more spiritual in church by the raising of their hands during worship.” My thought response, “Are you kidding me, you stand up there on stage and judge the congregation while singing……aren’t you supposed to be praising our LORD instead of being a judge and jury concerning the spiritual condition of certain individuals?”

    You must “be cool” to be in the band and fashion the latest floral print shirt, however, it does not have to be purchased in Hawaii, thank you very much for that! (Otherwise it would cost a fortune to be cool.)

    Each Sunday, the pastor must compliment, praise and adore the praise band, their gifting, and the sacrifice they make each week in providing “worship.” We are required to clap, clap, and clap some more to show our appreciation, as if their egos haven’t already been stroked enough. Then after the service, we again, are expected to say “Oh, worship was so great today” or “That was just the best solo you sang up there” or “Your guitar solo was so wonderful”……and if you don’t acknowledge their talent, you are considered jealous, selfish, and ungrateful, and thus, not as spiritual as those who flatter that band.

    And at the end of the service each Sunday, I leave the building with an achy head, tired bones, and an empty heart, for this is just another man-worship Sunday, all the while Jesus was waiting outside the door longing to be invited in. Yes, we praise, praise, and praise man some more, and the Name of Jesus never crosses the lips of the average pew person….in church, no less.

    I am sorry here, Truthinator, but I find more genuine worship, standing in the middle of my bean field, lifting my voice up singing precious Psalms and meaningful hymns, than I do inside a church building these days. For it is there, amongst God’s creation, that I can worship Jesus in spirit and truth, with absolutely no distractions……and there is no flattery to be given unto men, for the worship belongs only to our LORD. This is not a self righteous act of worship, but an act of raw humility and total submission to the Mightiness of our God…..and He doesn’t even care that I am “dressed up for church, no less.” Oh what a Savior we have, that one can stand in the middle of nowhere, in awe and wonder of our Glorious King, Oh what a Savior!

    And the “ritualism” we have created in worshipping our King…….so who are we really “worshipping in our churches these days?” You can easily tell when you hear this….”I’m so proud of my daughter….I’m so proud of the quilt I/we made for the Bible camp quilt sale…..I’m so proud of my son, standing up there playing his drums.”

    “I am so proud…..” “The pride of this life.”

    Yes, we are worshipping ourselves. The end.

    • Truthinator

      September 10, 2014 at 12:16 pm

      Well said, Ann. Thank you.


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