Monthly Archives: August 2011
When I was a child, I spoke as a child, thought as a child, and reasoned as a child but once becoming an adult I got an iphone & twitter account and elevated childishness to a whole new level…
Image from Calvinistic Cartoons
That was a wonderful rendition of “Livin’ on a Prayer” by Bon Jovi for Sunday’s service but did you remember to use drop-D tuning, Lass?
I’m sorry I couldn’t be on the stage at Saddleback Church today but I’ve a touch of hay fever… It’s nothing serious, it just makes me a little hoarse… How many Arminians does it take to change a lightbulb? Only one but first the lightbulb must want to be changed… I just flew in from Cleveland and boy are my legs tired… I am not a good dancer because I have two left feet…I would like to thank Rick Warren for allowing me to be here today despite the resistance of the nay-sayers… John Piper says he is doctrinal & sound and you got that straight from the horse’s mouth…
Some thought Ed’s routine was a shoe-in to win but others had nagging doubts. Regardless, all were glued to their TVs…
Goober: Did you see that pitiful sound system at that church in Siler City?
Andy: Yeah, no Marshall stacks, no guitar effect pedals, no synthesizers, no strobe lights, no smoke bombs…no wonder they’re not a growing church, they lack all the vital stuff.
Bob: Alright, Jim. What’s the call?
Jim: Who can be sure?
Herb: How do you feel the call should go?
Jim: I’m just afraid the players will be angry at the dogma of making a call. Then they might not come back to the next game.
Fred: I wonder what Rob Bell would do?
Jim: Safe! Everyone is safe!
“You are balding, you don’t speak well in public, you’re not very charismatic, and your taste in ties leaves something to be desired…”
John was especially gifted at ‘higher criticism’…