RSS

Monthly Archives: August 2011

Western Minister’s Confession (Humor)


Ricky singing:  ♫ Jesus is my friend, yeah Jesus is a cool dude, yes Jesus is my homeboy ♪ ♫

John: Is that what you folks sing over to that Tumbleweed Community Church, Pilgrim?

Ricky: Yes, what are you, a pharisee or something…?

John singing: ♪ Rock of ages, cleft for me. Let me hide myself in Thee. Let the water and the blood, from Thy wounded side that flowed. Be of sin the double cure, cleanse from wrath and make me pure.

Ricky: Double cure…what’s that?

John: Just as I suspected… You stay away from those Emergent garden parties, young man.

 
1 Comment

Posted by on August 31, 2011 in Uncategorized

 

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Take it to the Next Level (Humor)


When I was a child, I spoke as a child, thought as a child, and reasoned as a child but once becoming an adult I got an iphone & twitter account and elevated childishness to a whole new level…

 
2 Comments

Posted by on August 30, 2011 in Uncategorized

 

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , ,

Strung-out Relevance (Humor)


 Image from Calvinistic Cartoons

That was a wonderful rendition of “Livin’ on a Prayer” by Bon Jovi for Sunday’s service but did you remember to use drop-D tuning, Lass?

 
8 Comments

Posted by on August 28, 2011 in Uncategorized

 

Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

Mr. Ed Live from the Saddleback Comedy Club (Humor)


I’m sorry I couldn’t be on the stage at Saddleback Church today but I’ve a touch of hay fever… It’s nothing serious, it just makes me a little hoarse… How many Arminians does it take to change a lightbulb? Only one but first the lightbulb must want to be changed… I just flew in from Cleveland and boy are my legs tired… I am not a good dancer because I have two left feet…I would like to thank Rick Warren for allowing me to be here today despite the resistance of the nay-sayers… John Piper says he is doctrinal & sound and you got that straight from the horse’s mouth…

Some thought Ed’s routine was a shoe-in to win but others had nagging doubts. Regardless, all were glued to their TVs…

 
5 Comments

Posted by on August 25, 2011 in Uncategorized

 

Tags: , , , , , , ,

Relevance Lost (Satire)


Goober:  Did you see that pitiful sound system at that church in Siler City?

Andy:  Yeah, no Marshall stacks, no guitar effect pedals, no synthesizers, no strobe lights, no smoke bombs…no wonder they’re not a growing church, they lack all the vital stuff.

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on August 24, 2011 in Uncategorized

 

Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,

Emergent Baseball (Satire)


Bob: Alright, Jim. What’s the call?

Jim: Who can be sure? 

Herb: How do you feel the call should go?

Jim: I’m just afraid the players will be angry at the dogma of making a call. Then they might not come back to the next game.

Fred: I wonder what Rob Bell would do?

Jim: Safe! Everyone is safe!  

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on August 23, 2011 in Uncategorized

 

Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

Mark Driscoll Sees Things (Humor)


Young Mark Driscoll: I see gullible people…

 
5 Comments

Posted by on August 21, 2011 in Uncategorized

 

Tags: , , , , , , ,

 
Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 142 other followers